Me!!! Versus Him!!!

Just yesterday I was talking to my friend Hailey who lives down the way

We were talking about how it seems we are always busy

Yet when we try to tell people what has been happening

We can't really think of anything to say

"Every day is pretty much the same,"

I informed her

"Nothing much happens that is worth writing about"

Me and my BIG mouth

Why is it every time you say something like that

It always seems to come back to haunt you...

Well sure enough my words came back on me

That very evening none the less!!!

Here is my story

And I am sticking to it

Don't worry, no exaggeration here!

It is so good...

I don't need to exaggerate 

Last night

(as has been the norm)

The power was once again off

Fortunately

The solar was just set up two days ago

So I had a small lamp in my room 

Let me explain the lamp

Before I go any further

The lamp shade doesn't come off

And if you move it...

The light flickers...

Keep that in mind as it will be important later

Now for the weather

It has been really storming all afternoon

It had stopped raining

But there were so many clouds

That it was pitch black outside

Not even the moon was getting through that cloud cover

Now for the room-mate situation

I was all alone

Therese is currently in Kampala

So it was just me...

So there I was

In my bed

Watching "House of Flying Daggers"

(which as a side note I enjoyed... on and off through this story)

I had turned the lamp off

I was after all just sitting in my bed

Watching a movie

Why on earth would I need a light...

Well... 

That is what I thought...

Then I heard it

Things moving around in the next room

My first thought

The wind

My second thought

I can't see a darn thing!

And to be able to see

I have to get out of this mosquito net to turn on the lamp...

Now you may not think that the mosquito net is that great of a protection

But when you have no idea what is outside

It seems like it at the time!

My next thought

Ok calm down

You are over reacting

(Remember that silly flying cockroach!)

So I climb out of bed

Turn on the light

And see... 

Nothing 

Thank goodness I was just over reacting

For my peace of mind however I left the lamp on

And continued with my movie

Then I hear it again

Rustling and...

CRUNCHING?

What

on

Earth!

Stick my head out of the mosquito net to see better

Still nothing

Wind?

Does wind crunch???

It is 10 o'clock at night people

Give me a break 

I was a little tired

Still nothing

So back to the movie

Then

I saw it...

And dread sunk in

It was big

Black

And Scurrying!

What... asks my mind...

Could that be...

Then the truth sunk in

HOLY MOLEY THERE IS A STINKIN' RAT IN MY ROOM

AND I AM ALL ALONE

What does one do in this situation

I did what every self respecting Oregon girl does

I went and got a broom

And decided I was gonna hunt that sucker down and kill him!

Yeah, I was tired

But I couldn't hide in my net

Rats can eat through material ...

And nets aren't made of sturdy enough stuff...

I kept picturing myself waking up with my feet all eaten up...

Yeah it happens

At times like this I always wish I had watched less TV

Gross!

I had no where else to go

I HAD to kill it if I was gonna be able to sleep

So I went outside with my candle

And found 

A broom

With a broken end

"Yeah"

Thought I

"I can just stun it with the broom

Then flip it around and stab it with the other end"

Looking back I realize that thought probably came from the martial arts movie

I always feel like I could be an awesome fighter when I watch those movies

So picture me

Poking around with the broom

Trying the scare that sucker out

(By flickering lamp light no less)

There is a lot of stuff it can hide behind in Therese's room

So I was having a hard time finding it

So back to my movie I went

Waiting for the crunching

So I could fly out and be awesome

Bri Garrett

Rat Slayer

So this when on for about 2 hours

I would lay in my bed

And when I heard it 

I would fly out

I had it cornered twice

But the first time it rushed me

And I panicked

It escaped

Darn it...

The second time I was standing on the bed

Broom raised

Holding my breathe

Waiting...

I was SO gonna get that sucker

Unfortunately

He went into hiding

And quit eating things

That's when it happened

The solar ran out

Pitch

Black

and I was all alone

In a room with a huge rat...

HO-LEY-MO-LEY

Candles... 

Where were the candles

Found those

Lit them

Now...

I was hunting rat by candle light

You have NO idea

Finally 

At 1:30 AM

After chasing that sucker for 3 1/2 hours

I had to admit defeat

I lit a bunch of candles and put them next to my bed

I woke up twice

Once because that sucker was UNDER MY BED!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

So much for Bri Garrett Rat Slayer

The second time I heard him...

In the bathroom!!!

Let me tell you what

I FLEW across the room

And slammed the bathroom door...

Then panic!

He can get under the door...

So I ran and got a towel

And I rammed it under the door...

Then I pushed stuff against it so that he couldn't eat his way through

He tried though

BLECH!!!

First thing I did when I got up

Went inside and told Zane I had locked a rat in my bathroom...

Ew!

So the REAL Rat Slayers 

(Zane, Julias and Mr. Ahnono)

Went out

And they killed him

Thank

Goodness

Even Mr. Ahnono said it was a huge rat!

He was about 6 inches long (without the tail)

and really fat...

I

Hate

Rats...

Africa! Come on give me a break

Why do these things never happen when the power is working?