Just yesterday I was talking to my friend Hailey who lives down the way
We were talking about how it seems we are always busy
Yet when we try to tell people what has been happening
We can't really think of anything to say
"Every day is pretty much the same,"
I informed her
"Nothing much happens that is worth writing about"
Me and my BIG mouth
Why is it every time you say something like that
It always seems to come back to haunt you...
Well sure enough my words came back on me
That very evening none the less!!!
Here is my story
And I am sticking to it
Don't worry, no exaggeration here!
It is so good...
I don't need to exaggerate
(as has been the norm)
The power was once again off
The solar was just set up two days ago
So I had a small lamp in my room
Let me explain the lamp
Before I go any further
The lamp shade doesn't come off
And if you move it...
The light flickers...
Keep that in mind as it will be important later
Now for the weather
It has been really storming all afternoon
It had stopped raining
But there were so many clouds
That it was pitch black outside
Not even the moon was getting through that cloud cover
Now for the room-mate situation
I was all alone
Therese is currently in Kampala
So it was just me...
So there I was
In my bed
Watching "House of Flying Daggers"
(which as a side note I enjoyed... on and off through this story)
I had turned the lamp off
I was after all just sitting in my bed
Watching a movie
Why on earth would I need a light...
That is what I thought...
Then I heard it
Things moving around in the next room
My first thought
My second thought
I can't see a darn thing!
And to be able to see
I have to get out of this mosquito net to turn on the lamp...
Now you may not think that the mosquito net is that great of a protection
But when you have no idea what is outside
It seems like it at the time!
My next thought
Ok calm down
You are over reacting
(Remember that silly flying cockroach!)
So I climb out of bed
Turn on the light
Thank goodness I was just over reacting
For my peace of mind however I left the lamp on
And continued with my movie
Then I hear it again
Stick my head out of the mosquito net to see better
Does wind crunch???
It is 10 o'clock at night people
Give me a break
I was a little tired
So back to the movie
I saw it...
And dread sunk in
It was big
What... asks my mind...
Could that be...
Then the truth sunk in
HOLY MOLEY THERE IS A STINKIN' RAT IN MY ROOM
AND I AM ALL ALONE
What does one do in this situation
I did what every self respecting Oregon girl does
I went and got a broom
And decided I was gonna hunt that sucker down and kill him!
Yeah, I was tired
But I couldn't hide in my net
Rats can eat through material ...
And nets aren't made of sturdy enough stuff...
I kept picturing myself waking up with my feet all eaten up...
Yeah it happens
At times like this I always wish I had watched less TV
I had no where else to go
I HAD to kill it if I was gonna be able to sleep
So I went outside with my candle
With a broken end
"I can just stun it with the broom
Then flip it around and stab it with the other end"
Looking back I realize that thought probably came from the martial arts movie
I always feel like I could be an awesome fighter when I watch those movies
So picture me
Poking around with the broom
Trying the scare that sucker out
(By flickering lamp light no less)
There is a lot of stuff it can hide behind in Therese's room
So I was having a hard time finding it
So back to my movie I went
Waiting for the crunching
So I could fly out and be awesome
So this when on for about 2 hours
I would lay in my bed
And when I heard it
I would fly out
I had it cornered twice
But the first time it rushed me
And I panicked
The second time I was standing on the bed
Holding my breathe
I was SO gonna get that sucker
He went into hiding
And quit eating things
That's when it happened
The solar ran out
and I was all alone
In a room with a huge rat...
Where were the candles
I was hunting rat by candle light
You have NO idea
At 1:30 AM
After chasing that sucker for 3 1/2 hours
I had to admit defeat
I lit a bunch of candles and put them next to my bed
I woke up twice
Once because that sucker was UNDER MY BED!!!
So much for Bri Garrett Rat Slayer
The second time I heard him...
In the bathroom!!!
Let me tell you what
I FLEW across the room
And slammed the bathroom door...
He can get under the door...
So I ran and got a towel
And I rammed it under the door...
Then I pushed stuff against it so that he couldn't eat his way through
He tried though
First thing I did when I got up
Went inside and told Zane I had locked a rat in my bathroom...
So the REAL Rat Slayers
(Zane, Julias and Mr. Ahnono)
And they killed him
Even Mr. Ahnono said it was a huge rat!
He was about 6 inches long (without the tail)
and really fat...
Africa! Come on give me a break
Why do these things never happen when the power is working?